People often wish that they could go back in time and give themselves advice. Sometimes, it’s love advice. Other times, it’s just a clear warning not to go to that one party that led to a bad decision that took years to repair. We decided to look at what people who have “been there, done that” would have told themselves from another time, when they were younger. This is the love advice they had to offer themselves (and us).

This Is How You Know You’re Ready To Commit As one married woman put it for Marie Claire, “Too nice, weird big toe, bad laugh…All these minor annoyances qualify as ‘crap.’ You get to a point in your life where you’re ready to put up with crap – and it coincides with when you’re ready to commit and settle down.”

About The “Opposites Attract” Myth… One woman who was married for well over 40 years said that “opposites don’t make good marriage partners.” They might be exciting short term flings, but “a lasting union often involves people who have similar personalities and backgrounds.”

If At First Things Don’t Succeed, Don’t Panic. User workmymagic wrote, “Just because he’s your first love doesn’t mean he’s your only love.”

Honesty Is The Best Policy… All Redditor titangrove wanted to say to her former self was, “Stop trying to convince yourself you like boys. You’re gay and it’s all okay.”

This Is True. The best love advice sleeps_with_crazy could offer was, “Nobody else knows what they’re doing, either.”

Marry Wisely. Redditor IShouldNotTalk wrote, “Don’t marry someone just because you love them. Make sure your lifestyles, dreams and plans are compatible in addition to loving them.”

Be A Miss Independent. Sandra told Women’s Health Mag “Really, stop looking for a provider. You are enough and don’t need anyone to take care of you.”

Regrets? Another Redditor by the name of stay_lost warned, “If they cheat once, they’ll do it again.”

Talk Things Out, Really. OptimisticallyMyself wrote, “Communication, communication, communication! It’s so important. Learn to communicate with your partner. And if he’s lying, he doesn’t respect you. Besides the lies are ridiculous. Come on, now.”

Yes! Redditor patentspatented wants her former self to stop being wishy-washy about what others pushed her to do. “‘No’ is a complete sentence. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do for the sake of ‘politeness,’” she wrote. “You don’t have to justify yourself to people who are pushy. You don’t have to go out for coffee and stay for half an hour because saying ‘Sorry, not interested’ feels unconscionably rude.”

Love Advice With A Side Of Finance. “Save the money you’re spending on Brazilian waxes!” Gabriela tells the magazine, “That sh** hurts and anyone who really wants to have s*x with you won’t care how big your bush is.”

Mum To Mom. A Reddit user advised, “Don’t ever talk s*** to your parents about your spouse. You don’t want to make the person you’re married to look like a s***head to your folks.”

Wait! One girl said, “Wait to get married. Married when I was 20, and now I’m going through a divorce…”

That’s, Uh, Tough Love…? One anonymous poster really seemed angry with her former self when she said, “Stop f**** settling, you f***** insecure b****. Just because it’s something you can deal with doesn’t mean you have to deal with or want to deal with.”

It’s Okay To Walk Away. Multiple women wanted to tell their older selves “It’s okay to walk away from a relationship that feels bad.” Others encouraged a “healthy level of decisiveness during a breakup.” If you’re looking for a more poignant way of putting it, one Redditor said, “Let go when you know you’re not happy. They’ll just make you feel alone.”

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